ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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