Do you still have your period?
I think I am morally bankrupt
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Randomize
