It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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