He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
