I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
