try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
