The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize