He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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