I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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