i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
