I CAN MOONWALK!
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
