Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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