Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
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