Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
