so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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