Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
