Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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