It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be right there i have to get my cape
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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