He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
