So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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