So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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