ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
