If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
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