i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
My cat gives me a boner
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
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