Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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