I'm really into asian looking animals
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
