my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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