no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize