To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Just fell off a train. Bad.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
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She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
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I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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