first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
