And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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