How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
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