We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
