; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
