i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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