I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize