Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney