so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties