I must be too annoying 4 u.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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