I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
