i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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