im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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