I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
