So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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