Texts From Last Night

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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.

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  (608): Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting. (608): Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro. http://tfl.nu/1sa0
  Replies (18) Good night (1030) Bad night (2429)
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  (510): View more from California

  You want to go to a white party at LAX

  (1-510): View more from California

  Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach

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  (510): You want to go to a white party at LAX (1-510): Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach http://tfl.nu/866u
  Replies (14) Good night (853) Bad night (2034) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.

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  (773): Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best. http://tfl.nu/s8cg
  Replies (58) Good night (5586) Bad night (562)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.

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  (989): We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning. http://tfl.nu/h1ay
  Replies (23) Good night (5005) Bad night (634) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?

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  (814): 1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame? http://tfl.nu/zg21
  Replies (23) Good night (7455) Bad night (983)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila

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  (508): Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila http://tfl.nu/42fz
  Replies (24) Good night (1307) Bad night (3754) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.

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  (405): Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime. http://tfl.nu/065d
  Replies (17) Good night (2771) Bad night (828) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire

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  (847): I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire http://tfl.nu/ncts
  Replies (10) Good night (4930) Bad night (1465) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.

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  (630): I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive. http://tfl.nu/za3k
  Replies (7) Good night (3114) Bad night (1136) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.

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  (973): Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality. http://tfl.nu/dmqi
  Replies (9) Good night (1975) Bad night (890) Order T-Shirt
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny

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  (920): just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny http://tfl.nu/f2gi
  Replies (39) Good night (2047) Bad night (7156) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.

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  (253): Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real. http://tfl.nu/8edz
  Replies (7) Good night (2376) Bad night (715) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.

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  (770): Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this. http://tfl.nu/8f5s
  Replies (3) Good night (918) Bad night (348) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.

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  (540): I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking. http://tfl.nu/c4hu
  Replies (0) Good night (725) Bad night (276) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands

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  (619): Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands http://tfl.nu/hu3j
  Replies (11) Good night (333) Bad night (906)

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