Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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