Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Randomize