its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
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