Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.