This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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