Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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