My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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