I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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